August 4, 2005

  • SOMEHOW this summer between Sargent signings-in and fiery sentiment
    well(sometimes)-directed (Carson McCullers said: "The ideas were so
    chaotic, so inconceivable, he could not formulate his protests." I
    looked at that big-eyed then my wall, then wanted to dog-ear it
    violently or smear its print with flamingo-hued highlighter fluid in Clock Without Hands tonight), after ego-inflating
    overestimates of my programming abilities ---> tears, at night, at 4
    and entreaties and resignation (quitting/surrendering/sobbing/and so
    forth) I reached Where I am Now which I for the first time in ayear,
    exactly, wouldn't change. !!!!!. Right now I have a lucrative if
    menialish internship beginning in August, a grand volunteer position
    with Orlando's NPR station reading the NYTimes to the
    visually-impaired, Planned Parenthood eventswork, art museum envelope
    stuffing, and a network of friends I've learned to accept still love me
    though we cannot always sleep within five feet of one another/keep up
    with letter writing. The thing I want most is to emerge from this
    unexpected ebbIguess Gracious.

    Nick for twelve days came in July! We did Florida Things: braved the
    crowds at Magic Kingdom for a fine wonderful dazzling cuisine reward of
    latest-seating dinner on the top floor of the Contemporary during the
    fireworks show with explosions so close we couldn't see their golden
    tip-tops from our prime windowside table THANK YOU, INTENDED OCCUPANTS
    FOR CANCELLING @ LAST MINUTE. He's just dreamy--we made eyes at each
    other still after six months strong across some damn-good gouda, Splash
    Mountain-ed shorts (entirely unappropriate attire) and all. Then I got
    a Flash Migraine, passed out-ish in my polenta, and had to be rushed
    home, without Cherries Jubilee and with the help of one composed,
    -passionate companion who had to navigate the unfamiliar: monorail
    system back to my car parked miles from another theme park, network of
    gas stations from which to purchase Excedrin, interstates leading back
    beachward--how romaaaantic!
    I also enjoyed
    especially the evening he, Erin and I ended up on the floor of my
    former library painting New York City, windmills, and abstract
    peacock-centered arabesque, respectively, and drinking merlot from the
    bottle. Nick ate pancakes every morning, inhaled whole cartons of
    cookies by night, and drank an entire half-gallon of milk each
    morning--it was joyous. I have never fried so many ounces of bacon
    daily in my life, nor frequented the Taco Bell drive-thru like I did
    that week and a half. My entire extended family adored him which felt
    wonderful and I will miss him so much this fall but will thankfully be
    as busy as can be.

    My mother's had these suitable sayings and excerpts waiting for me on
    the breakfast table when I wake up--not Everything Happens for a
    Reason!s, but smart, silky snippets from Alcott and (hahahaha) Lady Chatterly's Lover,
    of all things, about sadness and triumph, because I have hated this
    year. They are comforting, alone and in the knowledge: that she had
    them ready--marked and lining her own tall, narrow bookshelf to
    transcribe, and that I'm doing the right thing.

Comments (5)

  • Yet another delightful entry in your stream of consciousness style. I hate migraines, I get them, too sporadicly. Good luck on the rest of the summer and the fall!

  • Fancy, keep writing!!!!!!! The thing about years is they come and go. Take the years by months, or weeks, or days and count the happy times!

  • you are madly incredible, and i'm glad life's passings are finally beginning to match it, my dear. keep on rocking.

  • Awe, ya'll are to cute Sarah! I miss you dearly, and that weekend you come back we deffinatly need to have another Goonion Reunion. Wow, those can be thrilling. Lol, what a way to end your trip here right? lol, We'll get the whole family together! Lol, just dropping a post though, love ya chick

    <33 Lauren

  • I love you! You make my life (especially my summers) so awesome!

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